You don’t know why you did it. Maybe you managed to somehow convince yourself you’re a “morning person.” (I wake up at 7 AM all the time at home!) Perhaps you lied to yourself and claimed that this will clear up the rest of your day for productivity and naps. Or it was the only time that seminar you were dying to get into was meeting. For one reason or another, you have signed up for an early morning class. Let’s venture together through the hellscape that is your morning for the rest of the semester.
Ten seconds after submitting my schedule
1. Setting your alarm and knowing you’ll have to be up in a matter of hours.
“I’ll get exactly four hours and thirteen minutes of sleep if I fall asleep right now.”
2. Setting multiple alarms because you know you will inevitably sleep through at least three of them.
3. Jolting awake to said alarms far earlier than you would like.
Oh, it’s just you, Marimba.
4. Smashing buttons until you figure out how to turn off your alarm.
How the hell do you turn this thing off?
5. Lying in bed, full of regret and disappointment about how your life is playing out.
Anything would have been better than a 9 AM class on a Monday.
6. Finally dragging yourself out of bed.
The unfortunate reality.
7. Realizing you have overslept (again) and don’t have time to bother finding a nice outfit.
I wish it were so easy.
8. Getting dressed in the dark so you don’t wake up your roommate, who is sleeping in because he or she is not a masochist.
Sorry sorry sorry…*knocks over something* DAMMIT, oh shit SORRY
9. Walking into the light of the common room.
10. Psyching yourself up to walk outside into the cold New Haven air.
Nothing will make it better. Just open the damn door!
11. Stepping out into the cold New Haven air.
I regret all my decisions.
12. Getting to class and feeling like this.
13. When the professor asks a question and the entire class just kinda…
Huh? What? I don’t know, post-modernism? Is that relevant to what you asked?
14. Getting back to your room and doing this…
Sweet, sweet carpet. Our suite really needs to vacuum.
15. And hating your past self for what you’ve done to yourself…
Hindsight is 20/20, my friend.
16. But knowing there’s nothing you can do but ride out the semester.
Preach it, GOB.