Sections are a small, intimate way to supplement the impersonality of a lecture with the hands-on discussion needed to fully be able to grasp the subject matter of a college course. Or at least, that’s what they are in theory. In reality, they’re tense and awkward periods of time that we spend staring at the circle of equally unhappy faces surrounding us, trying not to hate them but failing every time. There can be any number of people in the room with you, but they all fit into one of these 10 categories.
1. The one who never speaks because you never read.
2. The one who reads everything… even the footnotes.
3. The one who never speaks, but when you do speak you amaze your classmates and section leader with an answer only God could match, making everyone look at each other like “WTF just happened?”
4. The one who doesn’t know the answer but gives a long, unnecessary monologue to hide the fact that you don’t know the answer.
5. The sleeper.
Then we have the variety of section assholes. You might be:
6. The know-it-all (you probably know who you are)
7. The condescending turd (nobody likes you)
8. The teacher’s pet
9. The eager beaver
10. Regina George (everyone is scared of how much of a section asshole you are – even the teacher)
